Cultural Differences Between Australia and England
Emotion & innovation
Group vs individual
Tradition & change
Cults of multiculturalism
Warden & Convicts
Failed revolutionaries
Thinkers and Drinkers
Immigration and emmigration
Colonial masters
Convicts and Maharajas
Samurai & Convicts
Convicts vs Do gooders
Chiefs and Elites
East or west?
Kaffirs and Convicts
Coolies and Convicts
The middle-powers
&Australians appear very naive to the newly-arrived Japanese. They speak the same way with everyone.&
Hiro Mukai -
&Australians risked becoming &the poor white trash of Asia.&
Lee Kuan Yew -
&I can personally affirm
that to stand before an audience of beaming Australians and make even the mildest
quip about a convict past is to feel the feel the air conditioning immediately
elevated.&Bill Bryson -
have no need to feel iffy about a country where &relaxation is the aim&.
There's nothing to be worried about if &no worries& is your mantra.
People have killed for less.&
Soumya Bhattacharya -
& What sort or peculiar capitalist country is this in
which the workers' representatives predominate in the upper house....and yet
the capitalist system is in no danger?&
Vladimir Lenin-
&You feel free
in Australia.
There is great relief in the atmosphere - a relief from tension, from pressure,
an absence of control of will or form. The skies open above you and the areas
open around you&
D.H Lawrence -
& The Australian, who are the men our troops have had opposite them so far, are extraordinarily tough fighters. The German is more active in the attack, but the enemy stakes his life in the defence and fights to the last with extreme cunning.&
Major Ballerstedt -
&New Zealanders&who emigrate to&Australia raise&the&IQ&of both countries.&
Robert&Muldoon -
Cultural Differences between Australia and England
Australia&s
Convict heritage forms a kind of glue that binds it to Britain. Of course, British and
Australians naturally approach the heritage in a different way. For many Brits,
the heritage helps explain why Australians are
uncultured, why they are dynamic, and above all, why they inferior to the English. For example, David
Monre wrote in 1842,
&The extraordinary rapid growth which has followed upon
settlement of the scum of the earth on the shores of Australia would make it
appear that in colonisation it is as in gardening, the more your foundations
consist of dung, the more rapid and striking the production.&
Likewise, columnist Ian Woodridge wrote in 2000,
&A few years ago we colonised this place with some of
our finest felons, thieves, muggers, alcoholics and prostitutes, a strain of
depravity which I believe has contributed greatly to this country's amazing
vigour and enterprise.&
Australians haven&t always found it easy to come back from
the jokes and genuine insults made about their heritage. The creation of the
word Pome (word used for English) may have been an attempt at a
humorous comeback. Some have said Pome is an acronym for Prisoner Of Mother England. English critics have dismissed such an explanation because it relies
on the premise that Australians can spell. Another explanation is that it is
an abbreviation of pomegranate, which is rhyming slang for immigrant. The
English tend to be more comfortable with this explanation because it means
Australians can't count syllables correctly let alone make good use of the
cockney rhyming slang that they inheirited from England.
Valuing egalitarianism may have been another
way for Australians to deal with the Convict taunts. Basically, valuing egalitarianism allowed Australians to say
that, even though their mothers were prostitutes and their fathers were thieves,
at least they treated everyone equally and didn't judge them on their background.
English critics have
pointed out that it is easier to
be egalitarian when you come from the base of the social pyramid. While it may be a fair call,
Australians have shown a tendency to maintain their egalitarianism even when
they have reached
the top. For example, when cricketer Dennis Lillee first meet the
Queen, rather than be formal (as is custom in situations of unequal social
status) he expressed his egalitarian sentiments by saying:
&G'day, how ya goin'?&
In the mind of the great man, he was just treating the Queen as an equal. After all, it wasn't
her fault that she couldn't play cricket nor was it her fault that her subjects were
shocking players as well. Oddly, some English thought Lillee had acted like an upstart buffon. In their minds, the Queen deserved respect as her birth right and it was irrelevant that she had done nothing special with her life other than walk
in the shoes she had been given.
England&s story is the story of power being abused and
cultural values being created in response to that abuse. &For most of its urban existence, the British
Isles were in a state of continuous war. Not only were different regions of
Britain fighting each other, the entire region was continually being invaded by
mainland armies. The continued rape and pillage of Britain Isles ended up
producing a motley crew of cultures that the English authorities struggled to
gain control over. Although the people created myths of the good king who sat
at a round table and treated people with dignity, in truth English kings were
in such a battle for survival that they bribed those who were loyal and
universally treated the people like garbage.
About 500 years ago, the English decided that after being
invaded so many times themselves, it was a time to invade others. The
indigenous people of Ireland, the Americas, Africa, and Asia soon found
themselves with new colonial masters, and some English migrants wanting to make
a buck on the side.
&In its colonies, slavery
and indentured labour proved lucrative industries. In China, England initially
tried to engage in fair trade only to find that the only thing they could sell was opium. When the Qing dynasty banned opium sales. England responded by
invading so it could continue selling its drug. Not only did the England's victory allow the drug market to continue, it also allowed England to gain the territory of Hong Kong as well as a string of ports on the Chinese coast.
Although it had a distinct a profit element, English
colonising was quite different from that of France, Holland, Portugal and Spain
because instead of just taking things from the colonies, the English wanted to
build schools, roads and hospitals in them as well. Perhaps the English
realised that if they made prosperous colonies, then English merchants could
make even more money. An alternative explanation was that some fo the English who had
been mistreated wanted to do some good instead of continue the mistreatment. Either way, English colonies generally prospered in
ways the other European colonies did not.
Aside from colonising, the English devoted their mind to
improving medicine and industrial development. This led to breakthroughs in
infant mortality and new inventions that made many labourers obsolete. The
unintended consequences of the technological developments were massive declines
in infant mortality, population growth and unemployment. With similar social
conditions in France leading to the beheading of the French monarchy, British
authorities knew that something had to be done other they would lose their heads as
well. Ideally, population pressures could have been reduced if more English
chose to migrate but it seems far too many were wedded to their homeland. The
solution was to create a penal colony in Australia and force them out.
In 1788, the disturbers of the peace and hungry children
that stole bread were exported to Australia where they laid the foundations of
Australian urban society. For the next 80 years, Australia was supplied with
the Scottish, Irish, Welsh and English troublemakers along with soldiers to
guard them. The Convict history is something that forever binds Australia with
England. Today, few Australians want to remember their history and few English
want to let Australians forget it.
United Kingdom
Population
60,943,912 (July 2008 est.)
20,600,856 (July 2008 est.)
GDP per capita ($US)
$35,100 (2007 est.)
$36,300 (2007 est.)
GDP - composition by sector:
agriculture: 1.4%
industry: 18.2%
services: 80.4% (2006 est.)
agriculture: 3%
industry: 26.4%
services: 70.6% (2007 est.)
Public debt
43% of GDP (2007 est.)
15.4% of GDP
Racial groups
white (of which English 83.6%, Scottish 8.6%, Welsh 4.9%, Northern
Irish 2.9%) 92.1%, black 2%, Indian 1.8%, Pakistani 1.3%, mixed 1.2%,
other 1.6% (2001 census)
White 92%, Asian 7%, Aboriginal and other 1%
Export partners
US 13.9%, Germany 10.9%, France 10.4%, Ireland 7.1%, Netherlands 6.3%, Belgium 5.2%, Spain 4.5% (2006)
Japan 19.6%, China 12.3%, South Korea 7.5%, US 6.2%, India 5.5%, NZ 5.5%, UK 5% (2006)
From CIA World Fact Book
Environment
England has
shocking weather that makes people miserable. Darkness at 4pm, sleet and returning home to rising damp really isn't the type of environmental conditions that lead to a happy life. On the positive side, the English countryside is a safe
most dangerous wildlife to be encountered is a ruminating cow. (That said, English sometimes point out that cows can be dangerous.)
Unlike England,
is a harsh land with plenty of sunshine, snakes, spiders, sharks, droughts, and
bushfires. The English have long used the environment to explain why
Australians are good at sport but no good in culture. In the minds of the
English, Australians spend more time outdoors playing while the English spend
more time indoors creating and learning.
Both Australians and English speak the same
language, but they speak it in different ways. In England,
pronunciation varies according to class and region, which reflects England's class
conscious society and regional rivalries. For example, soccer player David Beckam pronounces th sounds as f sounds so instead of saying &I think&, he will say, &I fink.&
In Australia, pronunciation varies
according to gender and ideology. Australian men with a positive attitude to Australia are
more likely to speak like Bill Hunter, Paul Hogan, Kerry Packer, Lindsay Fox or Bob Hawke with a broad Australian accent. Australian women are more likely to
speak like Cate Blanchett with an accent that sounds like someone educated at Oxford University. Australian men that don't like Australia are more likely to speak like a woman or someone educated at Oxford university.
Contrary to myth, there is no regional
variance in Australian English. People in Perth do not speak differently to people in Melbourne. Furthermore, there is no racial accent. Very few children of non-English
speaking migrants speak with ethnic accents.
Aside from pronunciation, Australian
English has been heavily influenced by American English. Most of Australia's
television shows are American and American research dominates Australian
universities. Consequently, Australians often use the American spelling for
words such as 'organization.' They use both American and English grammar. For example, both the American &the couple is happy& and the British
&the couple are happy& are acceptable in Australia.
Australian English is more informal than
British English. Australians quickly get on to first name basis and refrain from
using titles such as Mr, Mrs, Lord or Your Highness. Australians
also frequently corrupt the language via the use of diminutives such as 'arvo'
instead of 'afternoon' or 'uni' instead of 'university.'
During its colonial era, England had an attitude to race
that George Orwell would describe as all were equal but some were more equal
than others. In short, the English positioned themselves as superior but
maintained a fa&ade about British equality throughout the colonies. Part of
that fa&ade of equality was maintained by denouncing Australians as racist so
that the English would be seen as non-racist by comparison. For example, at the Paris
Peace Conference of 1919, Japan proposed a racial equality clause to be included
in the Covenant of the League of Nations. The clause proposed:
&The equality of nations being a basic principle of the
League of Nations, the High Contracting Parties agree to accord as soon as
possible to all alien nationals of states, members of the League, equal and
just treatment in every respect making no distinction, either in law or in
fact, on account of their race or nationality.&
England opposed the clause because it was a threat to their
imperial interests and notions of English superiority. Rather than admit the
true reasons, the English stated that since its Australian dominion was racist,
it could not vote in favour of the clause. (A majority of nations did in fact
vote in favour of the clause but it was overturned because chairman, US
President Woodrow Wilson, stated that support had to be unanimous.)
Today, many English have become more honest and openly
admitted to their racism. So much so, racism was a big part of the successful
2016 Brexit referendum. On the flip side, there are also a large number of English that continue
to cite Australian racism as a way of trying to hide the racism of England. It has
not been an effective technique to solve English racism as the level of racial segmentation is visually prominent aspect of English life.
The UK independence party based its campign on being against migrants of colour. It was a success.
Although Australians often have a racist label applied to them,
Australian society has far more racial mixing than England. The level of
inclusiveness is reflected in the relative absence of racial ghettos and race-based group membership that are a
prominent feature of English life. It is also
reflected in the inter-cultural marriage rate. In 1998, almost half of all
marriages registered in Australia were between people from different birthplace
groups. In England, it was around one in ten.
Decolonising
For hundreds of years, being a British citizen meant little more than being
expected to recognise the authority of British rule and die for Britain if
required. After World War 1 and 2, movements started growing amongst people in Britain that
being a citizen should come with benefits, and one of those benefits should be a government that looks after its people. This led to dramatic
improvements in public health, education and social welfare. It also meant that
having British citizens all over the world was potentially quite expensive.
Aside from being expensive, an ethic that the government should be
responsible to its citizens also meant that it had to treat citizens equally. In
practice, this meant allowing British citizens in Pakistan,
West Indies, and India to
move to England
and gain the same rights held by the Indigenous English.
Not all indigenous
English were particularly happy with such versions of equality and they wanted something done about the migrants. The British government's solution to the cost and social tensions was to
encourage their colonies to seek independence in a process that became known as
&de-colonisation.& In a short period of time, England
shrank from leading the largest empire the world has ever seen to being the leader of a small island off the
coast of Europe.
The process of decolonisation affected Australia slightly differently to how it affected the motherland. In
keeping with British wishes, Australia
created its own citizenship in 1948 and progressively dismantled most of its legal ties
to Britain
over the next few decades. Papua New Guinea
was the closest thing that Australia
had to a colony. In 1975, a couple of chiefs asked for independence and Australia was
more than happy to help all Papua New Guineans attain it.
Art should represent the pinnacle of emotional, logical and
moral thought of a nation. Similarly, it should attract a nation's finest
minds to appreciate it. In the case of British art, it seems the finest minds want to consume work that is the pinnacle of a turd. When asked to define
British art, Tim Marlow, director of the White Cube gallery, said,
&British art is amazingly diverse, but I guess British
artists often deal with the dominance of the literary in our culture.&
With the dominance of the literary, it might be expected
that the art would inspire intelligent thought amongst journalists who work in words, but the opposite
is the case. In Seven Days in the Art World, Sarah Thornton wrote:
&In Britain,
the press never tires of the question &Is it art? and finds it impossible to
resist sex jokes. &
Defining British art as diverse and literary was perhaps a polite was of saying that it is an unrefined dogs breakfast
where artists use words to compensate for the fact that their work can&t speak
for itself. To put it more simply, iconic British art is the visual equivalent of punk rock.
also has its fair share of crap artists, but a clear difference between iconic
British art and iconic Australian art is the level of intelligence in the work.
The iconic artists of Australia
include names like Albert Tucker, Sidney Nolan, Arthur Boyd, and Russel
Drysdale. The Australian artists combine a kind of European expressionism with sociological
inquiry to produce works that had great feeling, but were also highly cerebral.
Albert Tucker
Apocalyptic Horse
The more intellectual approach to art has led to its rejection in England. For example, in 2013, the Royal Academy&s exhibition of Australian art
drew extreme criticism from English art writers. Waldemar Januszczak of The
Sunday Times wrote of John Olsen
&Olsen&s Sydney Sun, a giant panel of art installed above
your head, successfully evokes the sensation of standing under a cascade of
diarrhoea.&&
He also wrote of Aboriginal art that it &managed to create
what amounts to a market in decorative rugs& and
&Opening the show with a selection of these spotty meanderings, and discussing
them in dramatically hallowed terms, cannot disguise the fact that in most
cases the great art of the aborigines has been turned into tourist tat.&&
Admittedly, Australians are not renowned as great promoters
and much of the poor reception in England could also be put down to how the art was
presented by Australian curators and marketers rather than just the ignorance of the British art market.
The struggle for identity
In 2016, Britain went to a referendum to decide whether to
remain part of Europe. Ironically, the &patriotic& vote of no revealed deep divisions
in the identities of different segments of British society. The same identity conflicts that define Britain define most of the western
world, and especially Australia, where different segments of the population
have created and adopted social identities, not in opposition to cultures outside
of their countries, but in opposition to cultures within them. In short, Australia,
like most of the western world, exists in a kind of social civil war.
There are many reasons for why the western world is a war with itself. In Europe, much of the conflict can be traced to the inability of the
European Union to satisfy the identity needs of many of its constituent members but still seeing country-based patriotism as a threat to the European Union. At times, this leads to simplistic jingolism where people seek identity in a label without substance and by be against something rather than for anything.
psychology was seen in the British referendum where the slogan to stay in Europe had no positive myths of a European character or of a European dream. Instead, it cloaked Europe in a British flag and chanted
&Britain is stronger in Europe&. Not only did the slogan to remain in Europe rely on British patriotism rather than European patriotism,
it was so superficial that it didn't even specify what &stronger& referred to. Was it military strength? Economic strength? The strength
to bully smaller countries? In other words, even the pro-Europeans couldn't really articulate anything positive about Europe that would resonate more strongly than simplistic British patriotism.
The remain campaign relied on British patriotism (rather than European patriotism) to persuade voters to stay in Europe.
The UK independence party based its identity on being against migrants.
With superficial slogans not
resonating (even amongst those who created them) many proponents of the union resorted to accusing their opponents
of racism, which in turn provided some sense of cultural identity that the slogan or undefined notion of European superemacy did not. In other words, they adopted an identity of an &anti-racist& that positioned themselves as superior to the &racists& in their country.
Aside from the European Union not satisfying the identity
needs of a large segment of its population, Europe is also struggling because significant migration has
resulted in governments questioning the appropriateness of asserting a national
identity that migrants are not in conformity with. As an alternative, the governments have
advocated letting go of the past to embrace the future. It is an approach that appeals to citizens that lack nostalgia
for the past but offends those who do. Again, conflict has been the natural consequence.
Englishman John Aston talks of reconciling a British identity with a European identity.
Although there are similarities, the identity conflicts of
Australia have some significant differences with those of
Europe. One significant difference is that, for the last 70 years, Australia&s
identity has been on a trajectory of moving away from involvement in a union of
countries (the British Empire).
In fact, it wasn&t until 1948 that Australian citizenship even
existed. Prior to that, the Australian born were defined as British citizens
and expected to express their patriotism by championing British myths and
singing God Save the Queen.
Another significant difference is that
the history of Convicts, bushrangers and stone age indigenous
people hasn&t had the wide emotional resonance to inspire the significant country-based
patriotism that was common
in countries like England, Scotland, Germany and France prior to the European Union. Exactly how the Convict heritage has affected national pri however, American author Bill Bryson identified the shame some
Australians feel about their nation&s Convict heritage when he wrote:
&I can personally affirm that to stand before an
audience of beaming Australians and make even the mildest quip about a convict
past is to feel the air conditioning immediately elevated.&
Admittedly, not all Australians are embarrassed by their nation's Convict past. For much of the 19th century, an Australian identity was formed
by fusing Convict history, events like the Eureka Rebellion and Aboriginal
culture to create a kind of bush identity that was different from the British
identity and in opposition to it. For example, the song Waltzing Matilda built
its patriotic credentials by using Aboriginal words like coolibah, jumbuck and
billabong as it described a story of a man who stole a sheep but killed himself
rather than be caught. Likewise, on January 21 1888, the Bullentin wrote:
' Australia began her political history as a crouching serf
kept in subjection by the whip of a ruffian gaoler, and her progress, so far,
consists merely in a change of masters. Instead of a foreign slave-driver, she
h the loud-mouthed tyrant has given place to the suave
but when the day comes to claim their independence the new
ruler will probably prove more dangerous and more formidable that the old.'
Rather than 'the day we were lagged', Australia's national day should be
December 3, the anniversary of the Eureka rebellion, 'the day that Australia
set her teeth in the face of the British Lion'.
Naturally, those institutions that were formally and
informally governed by a British identity were hostile to the Australian
identity. Generally, the threat was dealt with by failing to give any official
approval to Australian culture or funding it in any way. Informally, this gave
rise to the &cultural cringe& which led to a cultural rejection of
anything with an Australian label. Formally, there was also some rejection with
the NSW government banning bushranging films in 1906 and the state run ABC
banning Australian accents until the 1970s (newsreaders had to be imported from
When the British identity was eroded in the 1970s and 1980s,
it left generations of Australians of British descent with a hostile attitude
towards the Australian identity but without a British identity to promote in
its place, or at least moderate the anti-Australian prejudice with some
cultural respect. The identity that has filled the void has been largely based
upon creating derogatory caricatures of Australians but without seeing
themselves as part of their derogatory caricatures. Examples of the identity at
work include Anglo commentator Catherine Deveny, who said in 2010:
&An Australian Flag in your front yard tells everyone
you're only a couple of Bundy and Cokes away from lynching a wog, slope or
Behind America,
has arguably the world's most internationally successful movie industry. The
staple of the English industry is the chic flick romantic comedy that deals with a considerate
English gentleman in a feel good
story. Not surprisingly, most of England's
famous actors are the likes of Jude Law and Hugh Grant that play the kind of
emotionally sensitive
funny man that a woman might advertise
for in a personal ad.
has produced plenty of actors and actresses that have found great success in Hollywood. Most of the
Australian actors, such as Russel Crowe and Mel Gibson, are quite masculine in
comparison to the English actors. (Perhaps relationships with such
men might motivate women to place a personal ad.) Conversely, the Australian actresses, such as Nicole Kidman, Naomi Watts
and Cate Blanchett, have been able to retain a strong feminine
quality that has seen them win the kind of elegant lady roles traditionally won
by the English.
In regards to movies, Australia's industry was successful in the 70s and 80s, but went to poo in the 90s. The new millennium continued to be as barren as the outback
in regards to quality Australian movies, but still showed that hope can spring in the desert. In
2012, this hope came in the form of a dog. Based on true events, Red Dog told
the story of the Port Headland mining outpost being brought together by a canine. It combined the fantastic tales of the dog&s life, including the time he swam into the ocean
with a steak to distract a shark on the verge of eating someone, with more plausible truths, such as being made a member of the union and being elevated as an icon of the community.
Boganism / laddism
Historically, the British have been fond of using Australia's
Convict heritage to explain uncouth behaviour amongst Australians. For example,
they have defined an Australian as someone &who reads comic books without
moving their lips& and an Australian gentlemen as &someone who offers
to light his girlfriend's farts.& At the cricket, the English often chant,
&we came here with back-packs, you with ball and chains& or they may
sing the song &we all live in a Convict colony& to the tune of Yellow
Submarine.
Although Australia
has its fair share of bogans who haven't had the greatest education in the
world, most
Australian bogans have quite a reasonable set of values. For example, if they saw somene in need of a hand, they are the type of people to lend it. They definately are
sort of people that would see a wounded international student and only pretend to help
so that their mates could more easily rob the student. Not so England. In 2011,
riots all over England showed that a large percentage of the English have such lack basic human decency
that they celebrate such thefts as the little bit of fun that goes hand in hand
with looting, smashing glass, burning cars, and destroying family-owned businesses.
For many people in England,
neither the riots nor the lack of human decency in such actions came as any
real surprise. &According to Theodore Dalrymple, an English writer and psychiatrist:
& anyone who has taken a short walk with his eyes open
down any frequented British street:
that a considerable proportion of the country's young population (a proportion
that is declining) is ugly, aggressive, vicious, badly educated, uncouth and
criminally inclined.&
&No sensible employer in a service industry would
choose a young Briton if he could have a young P the young Pole is not only
likely to have a good work ethic and refined manners, he is likely to be able
to add up and -- most humiliating of all -- to speak better English than the
Briton, at least if by that we mean the standard variety of the language. He
may not be more fluent but his English will be more correct and his accent
easier to understand.&
It would be wrong to say that the unsavoury behaviour is
confined to low socio-economic groups in Britain. In truth, every section of
British society leaves much to be desired. Specifically, in the 1990s, many Brits from well-to-do families
loved nothing more than listening in to secretly recorded
messages that involved Prince Charles
telling his lover that
he wanted to be a tampon so that he could be closer to her. More recently, Britains eagerly
followed journalists who tapped phones to gather dirty secrets on celebrities.
Australian journalists have never sunk to such depths because the Australian
public has never shown much interest in it.
has few natural resources, has relocated most of its manufacturing to Asia and has a population that is relatively unskilled and uneducated. Despite these facts, for
decades the British have enjoyed one of the most lavish lifestyles in the
developed world.
The key to Britain's
success is a smoke and mirrors trick by the financial industry. Basically, the
British economy is based on creating financial packages such as derivatives, which have no intrinsic
value but derive their value from something else. They can even be bad debts
that operate
like a pyramid scheme. As long as people buy them, they can return an interest payment. The more money that is circulated between the institutions and the more that derivatives are sold, the
more wealth that can be created.
As the British financial industry literally creates money, an
Englishman may look over his stock portfolio and confidently feel that he is worth tens of millions of dollars. Feeling rich, he will spend extravagantly in Britain's restaurants,
art galleries, or travel agencies.
The good life continues until creditors start asking for
their original loans back. The money that was created just disappears. A derivative
that was bought for millions of dollars then reveals that it was nothing but a
pyramid scheme whose only value was in the fact other people believed it had
value. Banks crash, stocks fall, and the multimillionaires can no longer live
the high life. The economy then crashes.
In the 2008 Global Financial Crisis, Britain was hit
particularly hard by the line of credit suddenly being cut off and derivatives revealing
that people who thought they had made wise investments had actually bought the financial equivalent
of magic beans. Unfortunately for England, its Government and financial industry is
almost bankrupt and other governments around the world know it so are less inclined to invest in Britain. With no money, the British government has had to cut
spending, which has
caused pain in the service industries. The inevitable
future for Britain
is a sharp decline in living standards, which is usually a trigger for social
Like Britain,
the Australian economy is basically built around a service industry circulating
money around but unlike Britain,
Australia's economy is actually built on industries that do actually produce something. The star
of the Australian economy is the mining industry and farming industry that constitute the
majority of exports. With a service industry built on something other than
magic beans, Australia&s
economic prospects are much more assured than those of England.
As painful as it may be for Australians to admit, English do
humour in a far more intelligent way, which usually results in the English
coming out on top during cross-cultural piss-taking. For example, comedy by Monty Python was
highly educated as it used
absurdities to generate a laugh and get an audience to consider an issue from a different perspective. In What Have The Romans Done for Us (from
Life of Bryon), Monty Python gave an interesting take
on anti-colonialism sentiment. The sitcom Yes Minister likewise had
an highly educated take on the political process. In opinion polls, it used
humour to demonstrate that surveys are not always as informative as the media
manager makes them out to be.
Life of Bryan - What Have the Romans Ever Done for Us
Opinion polls - Yes Minister
At times, Australian comedy can be
cringe worthy as it involves being
lewd, involves insulting people or involves playing teenage style &pranks.& In short, it is not very intelligent. Some
examples of such features were seen in the work of the Chaser, which were the stars of the ABC (equivalent of the BBC) for almost a decade. The Chaser grew
out a newspaper started by private school boys from Sydney. With their private schoolboy
background, their jokes are of the vein:
&Princess Di was just a slut for sex,
when they looked in the car wreck,
her dress was wet with Arab semen stain.
Stan Zemanek was a racist,
Dr Fatso xenophobic cock,
whose views were more malignant than his brain. &
In 2012, an example of Australian comedic styles got a great deal of airplay
in Britain
when two radio DJs rang up a British hospital and pretended to be the Queen and
Prince Phillip. The Indian nurse that took their call didn&t recognise their
accents as not being those of the royal family. She put the call through to
another nurse, who
wasn&t in a position to question whether it really
was the royal couple on the line. When the hoax was exposed, the DJs laughed at
how stupid the nurses were for believing such ridiculous accents. The Indian
nurse then committed suicide. If considered objectively, the DJs were obviously
pretty stupid for not realising that someone who speaks English as a second
language might not find it easy to pick
accents. They were also pretty stupid for thinking that
nurses would
not have their defences up over the kind of act only
pre-pubescent teenagers would attempt. Rather than be funny, the DJ's stupidly was sad.
Perhaps Australia's
problem is that it has suffered a significant brain drain in the comedy stakes. Clive James has shown a strong ability to make very intelligent humour.
Unfortunately, he has been living in the UK
since the 1960s, which has denied Australia from having a positive
role model. Paul Hogan was also very funny. Much like the humour of Seinfield,
he was able to point out the absurdities of modern life in ways that were not
insulting, profane or sarcastic. Unfortunately, he was hounded out of Australia by the tax office and by academia worried
about the stereotypes of Australia that were developing as a result of a world audience liking him.
With Australian comedy failing miserably on TV, youtube has
provided a ray of sunshine of sunshine in an otherwise dreary climate. Natalie
Tran has managed to build her channel to the 22nd-most subscribed of all-time
on YouTube. Her jokes are intelligent, non-insulting and non-sarcastic.
Clive James talks about the Sydney Olympics and Australian women
Natalie Tran wishes the media story on the murdered neighbour didn't always portray her as quiet and nice.
Natalie wants truth in advertising
Rock Music
has a very successful music industry that has produced some of the world's largest
rock acts, such as the Rolling Stones and the Beatles.
Unlike it is in Ireland,
political music is frowned upon in England and treated as somewhat of
a joke. Australia seemed to have inheirited the Irish tradition of mixing music with politics. Some include Midnight Oil, Missy Higgins, Jet, and John Butler Trio.
The English have traditionally been very
inventive when it comes to sports. They have invented soccer, rugby union,
rugby league, squash, hockey, test cricket, one day cricket and 20/20 cricket. They
have also invented tennis and polo.
Australians used to take pride out of the fact that despite England inventing all the sports, they weren't any good at them. Unfortunately, with England dominating Australia in cricket, soccer and rugby, the little point of pride is no longer relevent.
Australians play all of the English sports
and have also invented some of their own such as Australian football, indoor
cricket, touch rugby, surf life saving, polocrosse, new vogue dancing, and callisthenics.
For reasons unknown, soccer in Australia has largely been confined to non-English ethnic communities. England refers to soccer as 'football.' Australia, like every other English speaking nation, mostly refers to it as soccer.
Macadamia stuffed Emu Fan Filled with red pepper just on summer salad
During the penal era, the staples of Australian colonial society were wheat, potatoes,
beef, milk, eggs, sheep as well as fish &chips. These staples were English
staples. Outside of colonial society, Aborigines ate kangaroo, echidna, koala,
ants, grubs, snakes, lizards and moths. Because the colonists were starving,
they would have eaten the native Australian cuisine if they could, but they didn't know how to
hunt or find it. Furthermore, native produce was not suitable for farming so
it could only sustain people living a nomadic existence.
In the last couple of decades, both Australia
and England
have gained greater access to a diverse range of produce and have had migrants
introduce varied recipes of the world. Consequently, both Australia and England have developed fusion
cuisines. Potentially, the Australian cuisine will end up being the superior
because the greater range of climatic conditions produces a greater range of
products to work with.
is widely recognized as the most objective wine market in the world. The
English are large consumers of wine and respect quality.
Consequently, English supermarket shelves are stocked with the best wine from Chile, South
Africa, America,
New Zealand, Italy, Spain,
France, Germany and Australia. In what is a good sign
for Australia, the English
consume more wine from Australia
than from any other nation.
Australian wine shelves are predominantly stocked with Australian wine. Like
every other significant wine growing nation, Australians believe their wines
are the best in the world. Today, Australia is the world's largest wine
exporter behind France, Italy and Spain.&
Expatriates
Australian expatriates are very successful
in England.
In music, Kylie Minogue has almost become English pop royalty. In the humanities, Germain Greer is celebrated as a great feminist thinker. Clive James is a poet,
thinker, talk show host, and cultural commentator. Rolf Harris is a painter and singer songwriter that has had a number
one song on British music charts as well as numerous popular television shows.
Many of the Australian expatriates provoke mixed
feelings in Australia. Some Australians are proud that their fellow country men and women have done well. Other Australians hope the country men and women stay in England and never come back.
While Australia
has produced numerous individuals that have gone on to become celebrities in England, few English have become celebrities in Australia. E however, are prized for the cricket. In the past, the opinion of the English on many issues was highly valued. In fact, until the 1970s, all newsreaders on the government-owned ABC were English men because Australian accents were banned on government radio.
Although Australian women were able to speak with English accents, women were banned from being newsreaders. This meant English men were imported to be the newsreaders.
Political system
Both Australia
and England
are Constitutional Monarchies with the Queen as the head of state. The main difference between the systems is that England has a
House of Lords, whose members attain their position through birthright. Australia has a
Senate that functions in a similar way to the House of Lords, but whose members are elected by voters. The Queen makes no decisions affecting Australia.
Another difference is that Australia has preferential voting. When the ballots are collectively tallied, it is the candidate that is the
least hated, rather than most liked, that represents the people. It also allows voters to risk voting for an unlikely candidate in the knowledge that their two-party-preferred choice will count if the unlikely candidate failed to gain enough support. In 1998, preferential voting kept Pauline Hanson out of parliament. Hanson
won 36% of the primary vote, which was 10% more than her nearest rival, yet still lost the seat.
England uses first past the post so that the candidate with the most support wins the seat.
Playwrights
William Shakespeare is widely regarded
as the greatest playwright in English history. Shakespeare wrote comedies in a
poetic fashion that were entertaining, thought provoking and provided profound
insights into human behaviour. The genius of his work is evidenced by his
appeal across cultures and the ability of his work to survive political
scrutiny across time. Few historical writers have been so fortunate.
David Williamson stands alone in the world
of Australian playwrights. An immensely talented man, Williamson weaves good
humour into his psychological explorations of political, family and moral
issues in Australia.
Story telling
Across time, the English have proved that
they are the world's best story tellers. Charles Dicken, Lewis Carol and JK Rowling created children's stories that resonate across the world's cultures and across
For the adults, Jane Austin blended logic,
morals, and emotions into stories that have likewise intrigued people the world
over. George Orwell explored political concepts, with a particular interest in
group-first totalitarian regimes that protected the interests of their
individual rulers. Although highly political, Orwell was a man who proved himself
to be very open-minded and willing to change his political beliefs.
Consequently, his work provokes thought on political viewpoints, rather than a
lecture on a political viewpoint.
Australia's
most critically acclaimed novelist is Patrick White, who won the noble prize
for literature in 1973. Despite winning world acclaim, White
never won much
acclaim in Australia.
His lack of appeal in Australia
was probably a result of his negativity towards Australians and his constant
intrusion into political issues of his day.
Peter Carey is one of only two men to have
won the Booker Prize (a novel written in the English language by a commonwealth
citizen) twice. Like White, Carey got involved in political issues, which made
him as many critics and prevented widespread acceptance of his work in Australia.
Tom Keneally is another internationally acclaimed
novelist. His most famous work is Schindler's
Ark, which was subsequently made into Schindler's
List by Steven Spielberg. Like other Australian novelists, &Keneally has got himself involved in political
issues, which have prevented widespread acceptance of his work in Australia.
Television
Australian soaps like Neighbours and Home
& Away are immensely popular in England. They portray happy
neighbourhoods populated by good looking teenagers and their loving families. The
soaps might appeal because they fit an idealised conception of Australia for
the English. Alternatively, maybe the episodes are well written. In the past, the English liked Prisoner, which was an Australian soap set in a woman's prison. Perhaps Prisoner offered
another conception of Australia
for the English.
While Australian programs have been popular
on English television, not many English programs are popular on Australian
commericial television. For reasons unknown, commercial television in Australia
favours American- made programs. However, the
ABC has often showed
English programs such as The Bill, Black Adder, Mr Bean, The Goodies, Dr Who and Little Britain.
Stereotypical differences between Aussies, Brits, Americans and Candadians
Aussies: Believe you should look
out for your mates.
Brits: Believe that you should look out for those people who belong to your
Americans: Believe that people should look out for and take care of themselves.
Canadians: Believe that that is the government's job.
Aussies: Dislike being mistaken
for Pommies (Brits) when abroad.
Canadians: Are rather indignant about being mistaken for Americans when abroad.
Americans: Encourage being mistaken for Canadians when abroad.
Brits: Can't possibly be mistaken for anyone else when abroad.
Canadians: Endure bitterly cold
winters and are proud of it.
Brits: Endure oppressively wet and dreary winters and are proud of it.
Americans: Don't have to do either, and couldn't care less.
Aussies: Don't understand what inclement weather means.
Americans: Drink weak,
pissy-tasting beer.
Canadians: Drink strong, pissy-tasting beer.
Brits: Drink warm, beery-tasting piss.
Aussies: Drink anything with alcohol in it.
Americans: Seem to think that
poverty and failure are morally suspect.
Canadians: Seem to believe that wealth and success are morally suspect.
Brits: Seem to believe that wealth, poverty, success, and failure are
inherited.
Aussies: Seem to think that none of this matters after several beers.
Brits: Have produced many great
comedians, celebrated by Canadians, ignored by Americans, and therefore not
Aussies: Have produced comedians like Paul Hogan and Yahoo Serious.
Canadians: Have produced many great comedians such as John Candy, Martin Short,
Jim Carrey, Dan Akroyd, and all the rest at SCTV.
Americans: Think that these people are American!
Americans: Spend most of their
lives glued to the idiot box.
Canadians: Don't, but only because they can't get more American channels.
Brits: Pay a tax just so they can watch 4 channels.
Aussies: Export all their crappy programs, which no one there watches, to
Britain, where everybody loves them.
Americans: Will jabber on
incessantly about football, baseball and basketball.
Brits: Will jabber on incessantly about cricket, soccer and rugby.
Canadians: Will jabber on incessantly about hockey, hockey, hockey, and how
they beat the Americans twice, playing baseball.
Aussies: Will jabber on incessantly about how they beat the Poms in every sport
they played them in.
Aussies: Are extremely patriotic
about their beer.
Americans: Are flag-waving, anthem-singing, and obsessively patriotic to the
point of blindness.
Canadians: Can't agree on the words to their anthem, in either language, when
they can be bothered to sing them.
Brits: Do not sing at all but prefer a large brass band to perform the anthem.
Brits: Are
justifiably proud of the accomplishments of their past citizens.
Americans: Are justifiably proud of the accomplishments of their present
Canadians: Prattle on about how some of those great Americans were once
Aussies: Waffle on about how some of their past citizens were once Outlaw
Pommies, but none of that matters after several beers.
Questions to think about
Patriotism
Henry Lawson was a poet at the turn of the century and his
words illustrate some of the ways that British heritage has affected the
identity of many Australians:
&This was the loyalty which sent several hundred
jingoes and several thousand pounds to assist England in crushing a brave nation
of savages who were fighting for a country of no earthly use to anyone but
themselves...
Why on earth do we want closer connection with England? We
have little in common with English people except our language. We are fast
becoming an entirely different people. We are more liberal, and, considering
our age, more progressive than England
is. The majority of English people know nothing of Australia, and even the higher
classes understand neither us nor our country. The latter entertain a sort of
good-natured contempt for us which is only the outcome of their contact with
our own shoddy aristocracy, which is several degrees more contemptible than
that of England.
The loyal talk of Patriotism, Old England, Mother Land,
etc. Patriotism? after Egypt,
Burmah, Soudan, etc. Bah! it sickens one. Go and read His Natural Life, and
other natural lives, by Marcus Clarke, and then talk of the dear old Mother Land
that gave us birth. &
HENRY LAWSON Autobiographical and Other Writings
ANGUS AND ROBERTSON, Sydney
What differences between Australia
and England
cause Lawson to question the need for a closer relationship?
How does Australia&s
Convict heritage (His Natural Life) influence Lawson&s attitude to Britain?
Was Lawson patriotic?
In the American revolution, the British learnt the dangers
of patriotism. How could implementing a shoddy version of patriotism in Australia have
eroded the threat of Australians becoming patriotic and then using it in the fight
independence?
Does the relationship have value?
Australia and England share a
language and a Queen, or more accurately, the English Queen is the Australian
Queen. Despite these commonalities neither the Australian or British
governments extend any special privilege to the citizens of each other&s
countries. For example, it is easier for a citizen from France to live and work in England than it is for a citizen of Australia, and it is just as easy for an English
speaking Indian to migrate to Australia
as it is for a British citizen. (Citizens of New
Zealand are the other people that Australia
extends special privileges to.)
Could you make a case for a closer relationship between Britain and Australia so that the flow of
people between them would be easier or would you prefer to distant the two
countries even further?
A Republic?
In 1999, Australia
had a referendum on whether to become a republic. Polls showed that around 90
per cent of Australians however, there was division about
the type of model.
Australia&s
political leadership wanted the president to be appointed by a 2/3rds majority
of parliament. Their concern was that if the general public could vote then the
position would be politicised. Basically, they wanted a president that was a
symbolic figurehead but had no real power.
Critics of the model found it morally offensive that the
public would be devalued. Some likened it to moves at the time Federation to
have a House of Lords in parliament, which would give political rights based on
heredity. By resisting such moves, Australia ended up with a Senate,
where representatives attained their position by a vote. In regards to the 99 referendum, it was primarily because
most of the Australian public valued egalitarian symbolism that they could not
support the model presented, even if this meant a continuation of the Queen as
the technical head of state.
Both sides of the republican debate valued symbolism. What
type of values do you think a president should espouse?
What should of symbolic values should be expressed in
creating the process for appointing the president?
Create your preferred model and a slogan to sell it?
Make an argument for not becoming a republic
&Australia's culture has always been characterised by someone trying to make
rules to live by, and someone else trying to break them.&